Beyond Behaviour: Understanding School Refusal Through the Body - Our Family’s MNRI Journey (Part 1)
Published: 1 January 2026
School refusal can often be a big challenge for families - with children acting out when they have to get to school. In this month’s blog, our guest writer, Sophia Klopp (@positivedisciplinesg), Certified Parent Educator, shares her family's journey with Neural Connections. After more than three years of an uphill battle of school refusal with her son, Sophia writes how MNRI® and Neural Connections offered her a new lens through which she could finally understand her son's behaviour.
What happens when mornings become a daily battlefield — not because your child refuses to go to school, but because their body can’t?
For more than three years, most of our school mornings were filled with tears, shouting, and slammed doors. My son was only five when school became an almost daily battle. Back then, I thought it was lack of social and adaptability skills, and even defiance or anxiety—but it’s becoming more clear, it was his body’s way of saying, “I don’t feel safe.”
I’m sharing our story because I know how confusing and exasperating it can be when your child refuses school and no strategy seems to work. MNRI (Masgutova Neurosensorimotor Reflex Integration) gave us a new lens—a way to see beyond behavior and understand what the nervous system might be asking for.
The Early Years: When Learning and Homework Became a Battle
When my son was in kindergarten, mornings became extremely draining. He would scream, cry, slam doors, and sometimes even become physically aggressive.
“I hate school! I hate you!” were words that pierced through me almost daily.
Even waking him up in the morning left me with a knot in my belly, anticipating the inevitable struggle ahead.
I tried everything I knew—validating feelings, being kind and firm, gentle reasoning, whatever’s in my Positive Discipline toolbox—and, at times, I even resorted to punishment or consequences when I felt completely out of control. But nothing changed.
At school, teachers saw a ‘well-behaved’ boy who participated well in class. At home, I witnessed what I understood as after-school restraint collapse: a child who had been holding himself together all day suddenly letting go of the tension. It wasn’t confusing—I knew it was happening—it was just exhausting to witness. I felt depleted.
The Pandemic Years: When the World Felt Unsafe
He was five when all this began—around the same time the COVID-19 pandemic started. Overnight, our world became smaller. Parks were closed, playgrounds were cordoned off, and masks covered the faces of everyone we met.
This new, restricted environment affected his developing nervous system. He became hesitant to go outside, anxious around people, and cautious even in play. Even after restrictions lifted, he didn’t want to go to the playground or out in nature—he was scared.
I now understand that the lack of movement, play, and sensory experiences during those early years likely affected his reflexes and overall regulation, too. The school refusal that began then never really stopped—it just evolved.
The Hidden Struggle: When Homework Became the Trigger
One of his biggest triggers was handwriting and homework. He dreaded it so much that even mentioning the H-word (homework) could trigger a meltdown. I used to think he didn’t want to do it because he wanted to play on the iPad. But looking closer, I realized handwriting was only one piece of a much bigger puzzle for him.
His teachers shared that he had excellent reading and reasoning skills but often resisted written work. At home, he’d say,
“School is so boring, there’s so much writing.”
“My hand is tired.”
“I hate writing.”
We later learned that his body was working against him—trying to compensate for reflexes that hadn’t yet integrated.
Connecting the Dots: Meeting Hsiao at Neural Connections
I had known about Neural Connections for a while through a friend at Chapter Zero Singapore. Hsiao and I had collaborated on two Instagram Live sessions in February 2024 through Positive Discipline Singapore—one about the importance of floor time for babies and another about reflex integration for school-aged children.
At the time, I didn’t think any of it applied to my own child. He had been given a lot of freedom as a baby, attended a Montessori preschool, and had plenty of finger dexterity activities. I saw it as relevant for other families, not realizing how deeply it might one day resonate with ours.
By April 2025, after three years of struggle and contemplating homeschooling on and off, I finally reached out for help.
During our discovery call, Hsiao said something that struck me:
“His body may be so stressed that school feels unsafe. What he needs help with isn’t motivation—it’s stress resilience, and there’s an MNRI protocol that could support that.”
That stayed with me. I got very curious about that stress protocol and what reflexes my son needed to work on. They looked at the body beneath the behavior, a true bottom-up approach.
What We Learned: The Bottom-Up Approach
At his first MNRI assessment, Hsiao observed that many of my son’s reflexes—especially in his hands, core, and posture—were not yet fully integrated. She explained that when a primary reflex remains active, it can create a domino effect on other systems.
For example:
Hand reflexes affect fine motor control, handwriting, and communication skills, among other things.
Core and midline reflexes influence balance, coordination, and postural stability.
Reflexes like Spinal Perez and Trunk Extension support memory, confidence, and self-regulation.
When reflexes don’t integrate, the body works harder just to manage basic movement. No wonder writing felt exhausting—his whole body was compensating.
Reframing the Struggle: From Behavior to Nervous System
Through MNRI, I began to see that my son’s resistance wasn’t defiance—it was his nervous system overwhelmed by stress. Every school morning, his body was bracing for a perceived threat.
What looked like
“I don’t want to go to school. It’s too boring.”
was actually
“My body can’t handle this right now.”
Through the MNRI Parent Workshops, I learned reflex integration exercises. Hsiao reminded me that consistency, not intensity, would make the difference.
As I practiced with him, I began noticing shifts: mornings seemed easier, handwriting became less of a battle, transitions were smoother, and most importantly, he started trusting that school wouldn’t always feel unbearable.
Reflections: Finding Hope Again
We’re still early in our MNRI journey, but transformation is happening—not just in my son, but in me. I’ve learned that supporting a child through school refusal isn’t just about readjusting morning routines or even negotiating or forcing compliance so that I could go about my tasks for the day; it’s about getting to the root cause and rebuilding safety, one layer at a time.
If your child struggles with school avoidance, focus, or homework refusal, it may not be about willpower or motivation. Sometimes, the body is simply asking for support.
MNRI gave us a roadmap—not a quick fix, but a way to understand and work with the body instead of against it.
I used to think progress meant getting him to cooperate and go to school. Now I see it’s about helping his body feel safe enough to connect and learn.
In Part 2, I’ll share what happened after a few months of MNRI and applying what I’ve learned in the MNRI Parent workshop—how school mornings began to transform, what small signs of regulation started showing up, and how our family began to breathe a little easier again.
About Sophia Klopp
Sophia’s family started their journey with Neural Connections in April 2025. She is a mother of three (19, 14, and 9), Certified Positive Discipline Parent Educator, Trauma-Informed Facilitator, and Co-Director of Chapter Zero Singapore. Sophia shares practical strategies and Mindful Communication techniques to help parents, caregivers, and educators build respectful, authentic connections with children.
At Neural Connections, we focus on offering treatment and protocols to help neurodiverse children regulate their emotions and behaviour better. Schedule a Discovery Call with us today to see if we can help.
